a grin... or two...

Not necessarily nice... but gave me a grin...

A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot.
The robot clicked to attention and asked, "Sir, what will you have?"
The man thought a moment then replied? "A martini please."
The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had.
The robot then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?"
The man answered "Oh, about 164."
The robot then proceeded to discuss the 'theory of relativity', 'inter-stellar space travel', 'the latest medical breakthroughs, etc.......

The man was most impressed. He left the bar but thought he would try a different tact.

He returned and took a seat. Again the robot clicked and asked what he would have?
"A Martini please." Again it was superb?
The robot again asked "what is your IQ sir?"
This time the man answered, "Oh about 100".
So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to expect the Dodgers to do that week end.

The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a stool.

Again a martini, and the question, "What is your IQ?"??
This time the man drawled out " Uh.....'bout 50".
The robot clicked then leaned close and very slowly asked ,
"A-r-e . ...y-o-u-r . ... p-e-o-p-l-e . ... r-e-a-l-l-y . . .. g-o-i-n-g . .. . t-o ... .
n-o-m-i-n-a-t-e .. . . H-i-l-l-a-r-y-???"

=================

Dorothy and Edna, two "senior" widows, are talking.

Dorothy: "That nice George Johnson asked me out for a date. I know you
went out with him last week, and I wanted to talk with you about him
before I give him my answer."

Edna: "Well, I'll tell you. He shows up at my apartment punctually at 7
P.M., dressed like such a gentleman in a fine suit, and he brings me
such beautiful flowers! Then he takes me downstairs, and what's there
but a luxury car... a limousine, uniformed chauffeur and all. Then he
takes me out for dinner... a marvelous dinner... lobster, champagne,
dessert, and after-dinner drinks. Then we go see a show. Let me tell
you, Dorothy, I enjoyed it so much I could have just died from pleasure!
So then we are coming back to my apartment and he turns into an ANIMAL.
Completely crazy, he tears off my expensive new dress and has his way
with me two times!"

Dorothy: "Goodness gracious!... so you are telling me I shouldn't go out
with him?"

Edna: "No, no, no... I'm just saying, wear an old dress."